Frustrations breaking free.

How dare you be angry with me for pushing you away. You broke MY heart and then YOU have the nerve to get mad? How dare you...

What you make me want to be.

When it comes down to it I’ve realized some things. I want to fix things. I want to change who I’ve been lately. I want to apologize to you and truly be forgiven. I want you to apologize to me and actually mean it so I can forgive you, too. I want to be happy again, even if that means not having you in my life anymore. I want you to be happy, even if that means being with someone else. I want to say that to you someday, and actually mean it. I want to change your mind and make you stay. I already know that I can’t, but I still want that. I want to be a person that can be trusted again. I want to be the one person you can talk to for hours and not ever run out of anything to say. I want to be that one person that can make you feel like you have the world. I want to be someone you’d want. I want to be that one person you can actually be honest with about everything. I want to be that one person you’ll never fall out of love with, despite what happens between us. I want to be that one person that can always make you smile right after pissing you off. I want to be strong enough for you and stand by you like I know I can. I want to have a special connection with you that nobody would understand other than us. I want to be yours, and you be mine. But, I can’t be half of those things. Let alone, could I ever be anything you’d deserve or even want. But, I want to be. I guess what I’m saying is, all I really want is you. And I was hoping that maybe, just maybe, that could be enough for just this once.

The final goodbye.

Take my last breath as a symbol of gratitude. Not for any logical reason[s], but for the fact of my heart. It needs to be given to you, because if it wasn’t… I fear I’d never find anyone else to care for it in all the ways I know you could have. If only you cared.

Welcome to you.

I want to dedicate my emotions to something healthy and not wallow in this depression that I'm slipping into. I'm talking to someone right now that sort of thinks it would be healthy for not only myself, but for anyone else that has issues relating to anything in the life aspects of a teenager, to young adult.

The site is along the lines of anonymously(and by that I mean myself) submitting stories/ feelings/ thoughts/ hardships that I am going through. Rather now, or in the past. I think it will be a way to bring out the good in not only myself but other people, because others might be needing to hear that they aren't always, alone.

Even though, most of mine will probably maintain issues that I'm going through in my personal life at the moment. You can write everything your feeling, seek advice, or just say what you need so you can have someone listen to you. I think the site would be a healthy experience for not only the members that post, but the readers who just check on it occasionally to see if they can relate or know of someone that relates to the issues.

Although, I'm not sure which is worth making a website over. That's the valid. And I want some purpose. So I'm trying to give that.